Old Friend

October 27, 2017

Oh self-pity how I've missed you. You taste good. Truly, you do. You taste real. You have so many layers and you let me sink my teeth into as many as I want. Your chewy but you're not tough. You're ruthless but you're comfortable. You're reductive and restricting but so reassuring; an anchor and a reference in a world I'm very familiar with. You are convincing, you are cunning, and you'll answer all my questions if I let you. You'll validate all my stories and give me every reason I could ever need to swear everybody off and cut all of them out. God you feel good, and you feel real, and I wanna hold on to you; I swear I do. Certain things might really be too hard to confront without you, so I appreciate your willingness to help out, but for now, I'd appreciate you taking a step back. You do you, though! It's really not you, it's me. Just trying something different on for size, is all. I'll let you know when I need you.

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